Lessons From The Dental Office: Welfare and Teen Pregnancy

I’ve said before that one of the things I love about my job is the relationships I have with my patients. In the four years I’ve worked at this family dental office, I’ve gotten to know many families and have had the pleasure of watching them grow.

Some families seem to be in all the time. In my first week back to work, I saw on the schedule that one of my favorite families is due to come in since the son is having some orthodontic work done. I’m excited to see mom and ask how her last year has been. She is a divorced mom with three sweet kids ranging in ages of 8-17 years. I’m with another patient when I hear the family arrive in the waiting room. Imagine my surprise when I hear an obvious new baby cry as well…did mom have another kid and I didn’t yet know?!

No.

It was her daughter. She was now a grandmother.

Their Story

Her daughter just turned 16 the first week of May and was now a mom to a three month old baby boy. Though I’m a little surprised it happened to this girl given what I know about her family, unfortunately this is nothing new. After all, they have an entire show (16 and Pregnant) dedicated to the subject (update: Glenn has just written all about this- check it out!).

What’s worse about this situation is that the daughter’s mom, my patient, has decided to quit her job.

While the mom was basking in the glory of her new grandson, she tells me she quit her job- something I know she worked hard to get. She explains to me that she has ”no idea how she’s going to make it work since she has no savings and a dying car” but knows that welfare is ”a great option”. I draw the line at offering unsolicited advice to my patients about personal issues so I dropped the conversation with her. I’m still thinking about it today though.

Really?!

This woman honestly thinks quitting her job to raise her grandson so her daughter can continue in school, while putting the family on welfare is the best option for her family. I can’t help but think about how this is a terrible situation to put the whole family through. I also can’t help but think this may start a vicious ‘living on welfare/never getting out of welfare’ cycle for the young girl and her son. I see this story every day.

My Rant

Here in Canada, there are a lot of options out there (such as subsidized daycare costs) to help young and single parents. Wouldn’t a better role model for this young girl be to see her mom working hard to help provide her and her siblings, while she goes to school to get an education which will help her provide for her son? And if she’s old enough to have a baby she’s old enough to get a part-time job to help pay for their needs. Welfare should never be an option for these situations. Welfare is designed for those who genuinely need it for short-term use only. Not for lazy people.

I’m going to be blunt. People don’t want to work. It is so difficult to find good workers anymore. Our society allows laziness and offers too many ”easy out’s”. If you’re dumb enough to be sexually active at 15 you better be prepared for all outcomes, such as a baby. If you can’t or don’t want to put the hard work required into raising the child to the very best of your abilities, give them up for adoption or don’t have sex.

I know this is personal finance blog and this topic isn’t much about personal finance per se, but hard work is universal. Hard work should be the only option for this young family. Hard work is how we get the things we want in the world, life doesn’t give hand outs.

I’m working hard to provide the best for my family. I work full-time, have a young family, and work the evenings and weekends on my blog and freelancing. It isn’t easy but it’s the only option I have to get out of debt and give my family the life we want.

Do you think this family is being lazy in thinking welfare is an option or is the welfare system designed for these sorts of situations? 

 

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Comments

  1. I think it’s lazy. Hopefully no one hates me for saying that publicly 🙂
    Michelle recently posted..$7,641 in May Extra Income – Side Hustles!My Profile

  2. I was at a Panera bread the other day. Next table, there were two gentlemen discussing how to make more money. You would think it was a conversation about getting ahead in their career or developing new skills. No. At the end of the conversation I knew that having 3 kids is the sweet spot for maximizing the benefits they get from welfare (in the US). Apparently after 3 the ROI goes down it seems!!! So this one guy was encouraging the other (from the conversation, it seemed like both of them are unemployed, so are their spouses) to have one more kid!
    Suba @ Wealth Informatics recently posted..How can I afford everything I want? Should I stop wanting?My Profile

    • Catherine says:

      Oh man, again another topic I will stay away from…don’t even get me started. I personally know someone who is doing just this, not that he’d ever admit it….

    • This is particularly bad advice as I’m pretty sure that number is going to be reduced to 2 in the next year or so. Maybe not for all benefits, but for things like the EIC. I wouldn’t have judged the lady if she hadn’t used that verbage: “Welfare is a GREAT option.” At the same time, I can understand wanting to be there for that innocent child and wanting her daughter to finish school. Maybe she’ll just use it while she needs it, fingers crossed. I wonder if the daycare would have been affordable if she had kept working? I have no idea about the Canadian system, I’m just trying to give the lady the benefit of the doubt. A GREAT option….oi.
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  3. Gosh I admit to wanting to hold back my opinion because I don’t know everything there is to know about this family….and while it can fall under that “why should I care category,” well all know that people relying on public assistance DOES affect us…sometimes directly but more often indirectly. I’m trying to get into the practice of not judging people by the surface story, but I agree it’s hard not to be angry that some people DO take advantage of the system. They are the ones who give the system a bad rap. So I’ll just leave it at this: it’s a sad situation all around, and I do hope that they do the right thing and lead by example to do everything they can to not make bad choices so that this kid grows up seeing bad or irresponsible behavior.
    Budget and the Beach recently posted..Trying to Solve the Mysteries of the UniverseMy Profile

    • Catherine says:

      I understand what you’re saying and the abuse I see everyday in our system makes me very, very sad.

  4. I try not to judge but when someone blatantly comes out and says something stupid like that, it makes you want to scream. No, thats not what welfare is for. Its not for you to sit on your ass eating cheetos and watching bad TV all day. I am all for helping those who fall on hard times. We’ve all been there and I would like to help that the help would be there if I needed it. I would have no problem giving to those who can’t help themselves especially when they did nothing wrong but going on welfare like its a better option than working is ridiculous. Shame on her for thinking that.
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    • Catherine says:

      While I don’t think the mom would be sitting around all day- she likely would be trying to care for her grandson- she doesn’t have to. It’s not her responsibility. She should be working FT to raise the other two children who need her while her 16 yr old daughter is going to a school that has a subsidized daycare in it that allows her to get her education, have her kid in daycare and open doors for more training ot education that will provide a real future for her little family.

  5. So many points I want to make, first I’ll respond to the end of post prompt: I think that people do what they know. If someone is raised in a family where having children very young is normal/accepted and going on welfare instead of working is the norm, that’s what’s going to happen, generation after generation.

    Secondly, I don’t understand how kids get away with having a teenage pregnancy and then getting their child’s grandparents to raise the baby while they are in school. I know that they need high school in order to get a job later on, but how is that fair to the grandparents? There are several options when it comes to preventing/dealing with unplanned pregnancies, I wish active family planning was more mainstream!
    Jordann @ My Alternate Life recently posted..June 1st NETWORTH Update!My Profile

    • Catherine says:

      I totally agree Jordan. It’s a tough cycle to break and there are so many boundaries within our school education system that doesn’t necessarily allow for real life skills to be taught. Sometimes kids need to hear stuff that they don’t want to hear to better them in the future.

  6. So maybe the mom thinks she IS helping out by quitting and taking care of the baby because daycare is expensive or something, and she (incorrectly) think that her daughter working while in school is a bad thing?

    I don’t know, and like Tonya, I don’t want to judge too harshly. But quitting and choosing welfare voluntarily should never happen. It should be a last resort because of circumstances out of your control.
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  7. I agree with you completely on this one – even in the States this is pretty common. There are a lot of options out there for the daughter, but the mom didn’t need to put her whole family in a tough spot. How terrible!
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  8. It might be a stretch to call her lazy because she is leaving the workforce to raise her daughter’s child — not just sit around and play video games — and is doing it for the express purpose of letting her daughter stay in school. I guess the comparison that has to be made is between the amount she’ll get in welfare over the next couple years while her daughter finishes school and the amount extra in social services of all sorts (welfare probably and maybe worse) that we’d have to pay to the daughter and her son if she doesn’t finish high school. So at the very least, if her daughter and grand kid take advantage, it could end up costing society less from a money standpoint.

    It’s tough to say what welfare is “for.” I will say that it does seem like the sort of life-changing emergency that could absolutely demolish one or more people’s lives and thus, at least close to what the social safety net is for.

    I agree that she and her daughter have made awful decisions.

    • Catherine says:

      Oh I by no means think mom is lazy for quitting work to raise a child. I know how hard it is. I think it’s lazy that the daughter will allow her mom to do such a thing when she could be going to school with a daycare in the school which is subsidized for teen pregnancies. Mom should be encouraging her daughter to get her act together since she now has a child rather than quitting her job and putting the rest of the family in financial jeopardy.

  9. I am in complete agreement with you. Some people are plain lazy and just looking for a handout. What makes me mad is that I am paying for it with my taxes.
    Sean @ One Smart Dollar recently posted..11 Household Uses for Lemon JuiceMy Profile

  10. It’s definitely a vicious cycle, and gives rise to greater systemic problems of need versus want.

  11. That’s frustrating and sad. Both the teenage pregnancy and the grandmother wanting to quit and go on welfare.
    One of the concerns, though, is that childcare is very expensive, especially when it’s an infant and you’re low income. There’s usually alternative schooling options available for teenagers though, so she should be able to play mommy and finish school.
    I hope it all works out, I get frustrated hearing about these.
    Seriously people, consequences for actions… babies happen!
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  12. Overall I think it’s a very sad situation all around. The mother is throwing herself into poverty.. what will she do when her daughter is done school? Will the daughter then raise her daughter AND her mother?? In the end, I think it’s foolish on the mother’s part to quit her job, but admirable that she wants to help her daughter & grand-daughter (hopefully) have a better life.
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  13. Welfare shouldn’t be an option, rather, a last resort.

    I don’t necessarily like the generalization that ALL people don’t want to work. Some people don’t want to but there are others who aren’t working because the jobs just aren’t there. I am a hard worker, would love to work, I just can’t find any work.
    debtperception recently posted..Banking On DeathMy Profile

    • Catherine says:

      It wasn’t my intention to come across assuming everyone who is currently unemployed is by choice or laziness. I totally understand that situations arise. I know for a fact that this girl could get a job in this city if she really wanted to. would it be an ideal job? Probably not but she could try.

  14. Sad, sad, sad. The whole story. Yet another reason why birth control should be more easily accessible. Most people would agree that 15 is too young for kids to be having sex (key word there, “kids”), but if 15 year olds are going to have sex (and we all know some are) they need to be able to protect themselves. I won’t speak to the grandmother because I’m not in her shoes, but I can say I’d do everything in my power to stay off welfare, including working multiple jobs, not quitting my job.
    KK @ Student Debt Survivor recently posted..Top 10 Reasons to Pay Off Your Student Loans ASAPMy Profile

  15. It is definitely a bad situation. The grandmother’s statement that “welfare is a great option” makes me think she was brought up in a culture that considered welfare as a first choice. It might be that is all she knows.
    Andy Hough recently posted..May Expenses – $1658.21My Profile

  16. I have to agree with you that people don’t really want to work. Not EVERYONE…but a lot of people. It seems like the majority of people take the easy way out if given the option.
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  17. Ick, this goes against my grain. I’m not so sure that the purpose behind it is laziness; I am sure the mom is coming from a good place where she wants success for her children so is trying to help her daughter, but I would personally make it work where I was at least working evenings when the daugther got home, or homeschooling her – and what about her baby’s dad?
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    • Catherine says:

      I think the child is lazy, not mom. Kid needs to get off her behind. And the dad is no where to be found….

  18. I think she thinks she’s doing the baby a service by giving it the personal attention, but honestly if the walls are crumbling around her, the costs are too high. When welfare was first designed it was put in to help people during down times, and was never designed to provide 100% support that a family needs, and certainly not for the length of time that would allow someone to consider quitting their job. It just shows how far out of whack welfare systems have become.
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  19. Yeah, you definitely see this in the states as well – but the disgusting truth is that the welfare system ranges far and wide, and in many cases it’s a rational choice… you’d have to make lots more in a career than benefits would pay out (I saw a chart for Pennsylvania and there are a few ‘benefit cliffs’ where your effective tax rate would be over 100%). Can’t fault the person, got to blame the system at some level.
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  20. Welfare should be for those who has no other option, not a good reason to just quit a job. I definitely think it´s lazy, there are so many other ways to help her daughter with the grandson.
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  21. I think they are being lazy. Welfare is there to help those with the most need, not those who want a free ride.
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  22. Sad story all the way around, and Catherine, I totally agree with you about people in general these days being simply lazy!!! My mom was forced to go on welfare after my parents’ divorce, and used it for what it was for: getting an education so she could get work that paid enough to feed her children. So, I know the welfare gig well, and although it is free money, it’s no “way of life” nor should it be used as such, but it so often is. I applaud grandma for wanting to raise her grandson herself, but there has to be a better way!
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  23. Sadly, I think most of the comments are spot on. Welfare shouldn’t be used to provide for people being lazy. It should be used to help you recover from a horrible financial set back until you get back on your feet. All these subsidies and hand outs are certainly creating whole generations of entirely handout dependent families. It’s pretty crazy we let this continue and seem to expand it every year. Soon there wont be any workers left! (exaggeration, but not entirely far off)
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  24. I feel bad that she is thinks welfare is a “GREAT” option. It’s not meant to be a great option. It’s meant to be a last resort and to help you get through a rough patch. I don’t think she realizes the slippery slope she’s about to fall into. While it’s admirable that she wants to help her daughter raise her baby so she can finish high school, at some point the baby will either school or her daughter and grandchild will move away – now she doesn’t have a job. Who knows if she’ll be able to get back or find something comparable.
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  25. Yikes – that’s terrible 🙁 Welfare shouldn’t be an option, it’s a safety net for those who are truly down and out. I agree with your assessment – mom should have at least tried to continue work and asked her daughter to find a part time job after school as well. After all, it’s her kid. Bleh…
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Lessons From The Dental Office: Welfare and Teen Pregnancy

I’ve said before that one of the things I love about my job is the relationships I have with my patients. In the four years I’ve worked at this family dental office, I’ve gotten to know many families and have had the pleasure of watching them grow.

Some families seem to be in all the time. In my first week back to work, I saw on the schedule that one of my favorite families is due to come in since the son is having some orthodontic work done. I’m excited to see mom and ask how her last year has been. She is a divorced mom with three sweet kids ranging in ages of 8-17 years. I’m with another patient when I hear the family arrive in the waiting room. Imagine my surprise when I hear an obvious new baby cry as well…did mom have another kid and I didn’t yet know?!

No.

It was her daughter. She was now a grandmother.

Their Story

Her daughter just turned 16 the first week of May and was now a mom to a three month old baby boy. Though I’m a little surprised it happened to this girl given what I know about her family, unfortunately this is nothing new. After all, they have an entire show (16 and Pregnant) dedicated to the subject (update: Glenn has just written all about this- check it out!).

What’s worse about this situation is that the daughter’s mom, my patient, has decided to quit her job.

While the mom was basking in the glory of her new grandson, she tells me she quit her job- something I know she worked hard to get. She explains to me that she has ”no idea how she’s going to make it work since she has no savings and a dying car” but knows that welfare is ”a great option”. I draw the line at offering unsolicited advice to my patients about personal issues so I dropped the conversation with her. I’m still thinking about it today though.

Really?!

This woman honestly thinks quitting her job to raise her grandson so her daughter can continue in school, while putting the family on welfare is the best option for her family. I can’t help but think about how this is a terrible situation to put the whole family through. I also can’t help but think this may start a vicious ‘living on welfare/never getting out of welfare’ cycle for the young girl and her son. I see this story every day.

My Rant

Here in Canada, there are a lot of options out there (such as subsidized daycare costs) to help young and single parents. Wouldn’t a better role model for this young girl be to see her mom working hard to help provide her and her siblings, while she goes to school to get an education which will help her provide for her son? And if she’s old enough to have a baby she’s old enough to get a part-time job to help pay for their needs. Welfare should never be an option for these situations. Welfare is designed for those who genuinely need it for short-term use only. Not for lazy people.

I’m going to be blunt. People don’t want to work. It is so difficult to find good workers anymore. Our society allows laziness and offers too many ”easy out’s”. If you’re dumb enough to be sexually active at 15 you better be prepared for all outcomes, such as a baby. If you can’t or don’t want to put the hard work required into raising the child to the very best of your abilities, give them up for adoption or don’t have sex.

I know this is personal finance blog and this topic isn’t much about personal finance per se, but hard work is universal. Hard work should be the only option for this young family. Hard work is how we get the things we want in the world, life doesn’t give hand outs.

I’m working hard to provide the best for my family. I work full-time, have a young family, and work the evenings and weekends on my blog and freelancing. It isn’t easy but it’s the only option I have to get out of debt and give my family the life we want.

Do you think this family is being lazy in thinking welfare is an option or is the welfare system designed for these sorts of situations? 

 

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  1. Michelle says:

    I think it’s lazy. Hopefully no one hates me for saying that publicly 🙂
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    1. Catherine says:

      haha, I certainly won’t!

  2. I was at a Panera bread the other day. Next table, there were two gentlemen discussing how to make more money. You would think it was a conversation about getting ahead in their career or developing new skills. No. At the end of the conversation I knew that having 3 kids is the sweet spot for maximizing the benefits they get from welfare (in the US). Apparently after 3 the ROI goes down it seems!!! So this one guy was encouraging the other (from the conversation, it seemed like both of them are unemployed, so are their spouses) to have one more kid!
    Suba @ Wealth Informatics recently posted..How can I afford everything I want? Should I stop wanting?My Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      Oh man, again another topic I will stay away from…don’t even get me started. I personally know someone who is doing just this, not that he’d ever admit it….

    2. This is particularly bad advice as I’m pretty sure that number is going to be reduced to 2 in the next year or so. Maybe not for all benefits, but for things like the EIC. I wouldn’t have judged the lady if she hadn’t used that verbage: “Welfare is a GREAT option.” At the same time, I can understand wanting to be there for that innocent child and wanting her daughter to finish school. Maybe she’ll just use it while she needs it, fingers crossed. I wonder if the daycare would have been affordable if she had kept working? I have no idea about the Canadian system, I’m just trying to give the lady the benefit of the doubt. A GREAT option….oi.
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  3. Gosh I admit to wanting to hold back my opinion because I don’t know everything there is to know about this family….and while it can fall under that “why should I care category,” well all know that people relying on public assistance DOES affect us…sometimes directly but more often indirectly. I’m trying to get into the practice of not judging people by the surface story, but I agree it’s hard not to be angry that some people DO take advantage of the system. They are the ones who give the system a bad rap. So I’ll just leave it at this: it’s a sad situation all around, and I do hope that they do the right thing and lead by example to do everything they can to not make bad choices so that this kid grows up seeing bad or irresponsible behavior.
    Budget and the Beach recently posted..Trying to Solve the Mysteries of the UniverseMy Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      I understand what you’re saying and the abuse I see everyday in our system makes me very, very sad.

  4. I try not to judge but when someone blatantly comes out and says something stupid like that, it makes you want to scream. No, thats not what welfare is for. Its not for you to sit on your ass eating cheetos and watching bad TV all day. I am all for helping those who fall on hard times. We’ve all been there and I would like to help that the help would be there if I needed it. I would have no problem giving to those who can’t help themselves especially when they did nothing wrong but going on welfare like its a better option than working is ridiculous. Shame on her for thinking that.
    Debt and the Girl recently posted..Holy Cow! Is That How Much I Spend on Food?My Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      While I don’t think the mom would be sitting around all day- she likely would be trying to care for her grandson- she doesn’t have to. It’s not her responsibility. She should be working FT to raise the other two children who need her while her 16 yr old daughter is going to a school that has a subsidized daycare in it that allows her to get her education, have her kid in daycare and open doors for more training ot education that will provide a real future for her little family.

  5. So many points I want to make, first I’ll respond to the end of post prompt: I think that people do what they know. If someone is raised in a family where having children very young is normal/accepted and going on welfare instead of working is the norm, that’s what’s going to happen, generation after generation.

    Secondly, I don’t understand how kids get away with having a teenage pregnancy and then getting their child’s grandparents to raise the baby while they are in school. I know that they need high school in order to get a job later on, but how is that fair to the grandparents? There are several options when it comes to preventing/dealing with unplanned pregnancies, I wish active family planning was more mainstream!
    Jordann @ My Alternate Life recently posted..June 1st NETWORTH Update!My Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      I totally agree Jordan. It’s a tough cycle to break and there are so many boundaries within our school education system that doesn’t necessarily allow for real life skills to be taught. Sometimes kids need to hear stuff that they don’t want to hear to better them in the future.

  6. So maybe the mom thinks she IS helping out by quitting and taking care of the baby because daycare is expensive or something, and she (incorrectly) think that her daughter working while in school is a bad thing?

    I don’t know, and like Tonya, I don’t want to judge too harshly. But quitting and choosing welfare voluntarily should never happen. It should be a last resort because of circumstances out of your control.
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  7. I agree with you completely on this one – even in the States this is pretty common. There are a lot of options out there for the daughter, but the mom didn’t need to put her whole family in a tough spot. How terrible!
    The College Investor recently posted..Reader Question: What Personal Finance Software Do You Recommend?My Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      Exactly!

  8. Debt Blag says:

    It might be a stretch to call her lazy because she is leaving the workforce to raise her daughter’s child — not just sit around and play video games — and is doing it for the express purpose of letting her daughter stay in school. I guess the comparison that has to be made is between the amount she’ll get in welfare over the next couple years while her daughter finishes school and the amount extra in social services of all sorts (welfare probably and maybe worse) that we’d have to pay to the daughter and her son if she doesn’t finish high school. So at the very least, if her daughter and grand kid take advantage, it could end up costing society less from a money standpoint.

    It’s tough to say what welfare is “for.” I will say that it does seem like the sort of life-changing emergency that could absolutely demolish one or more people’s lives and thus, at least close to what the social safety net is for.

    I agree that she and her daughter have made awful decisions.

    1. Catherine says:

      Oh I by no means think mom is lazy for quitting work to raise a child. I know how hard it is. I think it’s lazy that the daughter will allow her mom to do such a thing when she could be going to school with a daycare in the school which is subsidized for teen pregnancies. Mom should be encouraging her daughter to get her act together since she now has a child rather than quitting her job and putting the rest of the family in financial jeopardy.

  9. I am in complete agreement with you. Some people are plain lazy and just looking for a handout. What makes me mad is that I am paying for it with my taxes.
    Sean @ One Smart Dollar recently posted..11 Household Uses for Lemon JuiceMy Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      Don’t even get me started on that….

  10. It’s definitely a vicious cycle, and gives rise to greater systemic problems of need versus want.

  11. That’s frustrating and sad. Both the teenage pregnancy and the grandmother wanting to quit and go on welfare.
    One of the concerns, though, is that childcare is very expensive, especially when it’s an infant and you’re low income. There’s usually alternative schooling options available for teenagers though, so she should be able to play mommy and finish school.
    I hope it all works out, I get frustrated hearing about these.
    Seriously people, consequences for actions… babies happen!
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  12. Carla says:

    Overall I think it’s a very sad situation all around. The mother is throwing herself into poverty.. what will she do when her daughter is done school? Will the daughter then raise her daughter AND her mother?? In the end, I think it’s foolish on the mother’s part to quit her job, but admirable that she wants to help her daughter & grand-daughter (hopefully) have a better life.
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  13. Welfare shouldn’t be an option, rather, a last resort.

    I don’t necessarily like the generalization that ALL people don’t want to work. Some people don’t want to but there are others who aren’t working because the jobs just aren’t there. I am a hard worker, would love to work, I just can’t find any work.
    debtperception recently posted..Banking On DeathMy Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      It wasn’t my intention to come across assuming everyone who is currently unemployed is by choice or laziness. I totally understand that situations arise. I know for a fact that this girl could get a job in this city if she really wanted to. would it be an ideal job? Probably not but she could try.

  14. Sad, sad, sad. The whole story. Yet another reason why birth control should be more easily accessible. Most people would agree that 15 is too young for kids to be having sex (key word there, “kids”), but if 15 year olds are going to have sex (and we all know some are) they need to be able to protect themselves. I won’t speak to the grandmother because I’m not in her shoes, but I can say I’d do everything in my power to stay off welfare, including working multiple jobs, not quitting my job.
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    1. Catherine says:

      Agreed.

  15. Andy Hough says:

    It is definitely a bad situation. The grandmother’s statement that “welfare is a great option” makes me think she was brought up in a culture that considered welfare as a first choice. It might be that is all she knows.
    Andy Hough recently posted..May Expenses – $1658.21My Profile

  16. I have to agree with you that people don’t really want to work. Not EVERYONE…but a lot of people. It seems like the majority of people take the easy way out if given the option.
    Holly@ClubThrifty recently posted..Stuff My Daughter WantsMy Profile

  17. Ick, this goes against my grain. I’m not so sure that the purpose behind it is laziness; I am sure the mom is coming from a good place where she wants success for her children so is trying to help her daughter, but I would personally make it work where I was at least working evenings when the daugther got home, or homeschooling her – and what about her baby’s dad?
    SuburbanFinance recently posted..Financial Tips for Young PeopleMy Profile

    1. Catherine says:

      I think the child is lazy, not mom. Kid needs to get off her behind. And the dad is no where to be found….

  18. Money Beagle says:

    I think she thinks she’s doing the baby a service by giving it the personal attention, but honestly if the walls are crumbling around her, the costs are too high. When welfare was first designed it was put in to help people during down times, and was never designed to provide 100% support that a family needs, and certainly not for the length of time that would allow someone to consider quitting their job. It just shows how far out of whack welfare systems have become.
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  19. PK says:

    Yeah, you definitely see this in the states as well – but the disgusting truth is that the welfare system ranges far and wide, and in many cases it’s a rational choice… you’d have to make lots more in a career than benefits would pay out (I saw a chart for Pennsylvania and there are a few ‘benefit cliffs’ where your effective tax rate would be over 100%). Can’t fault the person, got to blame the system at some level.
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  20. Welfare should be for those who has no other option, not a good reason to just quit a job. I definitely think it´s lazy, there are so many other ways to help her daughter with the grandson.
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  21. I think they are being lazy. Welfare is there to help those with the most need, not those who want a free ride.
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  22. Sad story all the way around, and Catherine, I totally agree with you about people in general these days being simply lazy!!! My mom was forced to go on welfare after my parents’ divorce, and used it for what it was for: getting an education so she could get work that paid enough to feed her children. So, I know the welfare gig well, and although it is free money, it’s no “way of life” nor should it be used as such, but it so often is. I applaud grandma for wanting to raise her grandson herself, but there has to be a better way!
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  23. Sadly, I think most of the comments are spot on. Welfare shouldn’t be used to provide for people being lazy. It should be used to help you recover from a horrible financial set back until you get back on your feet. All these subsidies and hand outs are certainly creating whole generations of entirely handout dependent families. It’s pretty crazy we let this continue and seem to expand it every year. Soon there wont be any workers left! (exaggeration, but not entirely far off)
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  24. I feel bad that she is thinks welfare is a “GREAT” option. It’s not meant to be a great option. It’s meant to be a last resort and to help you get through a rough patch. I don’t think she realizes the slippery slope she’s about to fall into. While it’s admirable that she wants to help her daughter raise her baby so she can finish high school, at some point the baby will either school or her daughter and grandchild will move away – now she doesn’t have a job. Who knows if she’ll be able to get back or find something comparable.
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  25. CF says:

    Yikes – that’s terrible 🙁 Welfare shouldn’t be an option, it’s a safety net for those who are truly down and out. I agree with your assessment – mom should have at least tried to continue work and asked her daughter to find a part time job after school as well. After all, it’s her kid. Bleh…
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